White House Correspondents´Dinner 2018

White House Correspondents´Dinner 2018

Last Saturday, Michelle Wolf gave a controversial speech at the White House Correspondents´dinner. 

I´ve transcribed some of the highlights of her speech. Do you think she went too far?

Good evening, good evening, here we are, the White House Correspondents´ Dinner. Like a porn star says when she´s about to have sex with The Trump, “let´s get this over with”. Yep, kiddos, this is who you´re getting tonight. I´m gonna skip a lot of the normal pleasantries*, we´re at the Hilton, it´s not nice. This is on C- Span, no one watches that. Trump is president, it´s not ideal. White House Correspondents´ Association, thank you for having me, the monkfish was fine. And just a reminder to everyone: I´m here to make jokes, I have no agenda, I´m not trying to get anything accomplished, so everyone that´s here from Congress, you should feel right at home. Now, before we get too far, a little bit about me, a lot of you might not know who I am. I´m 32 years old, which is an odd age: 10 years too young to host this event and 20 years too old for Roy Moore. I know, he almost got elected. Yeah. It was fun. It was fun.

5.10

People call Trump names all the time. And look, I could call Trump a racist or a misogynist or xenophobic or unstable or incompetent or impotent, but he´s heard all of those and he doesn´t care. So tonight, I´m gonna try to make fun of the president in a new way. In a way that I think will really get him. Mr President: I don’t think you´re very rich. Like, I think you might be rich in Idaho, but in New York you´re doing fine. Trump is the only person that still watches “Who wants to be a millionaire” and thinks “Me!” Although I´m not sure he´d get very far, he´d get to like the third question and be like “I have to phone a “Fox and friend”. We´re gonna try a fun new thing, ok? I´m gonna say “Trump is so broke” and you guys go: “How broke is he?” Alright? Trump is so broke (How broke is he?) he has to fly failed business class. Trump is so broke (How broke is he?) he looked for foreign oil in Don Jr.´s hair. Trump is so broke (How broke is he?) Southwest used him as one of their engines. I know, it´s so soon. It´s so soon for that joke. Why did you tell it? It´s so soon.  Trump is so broke (How broke is he?) he had to borrow money from the Russians and now he´s compromised and not susceptible to blackmail and possibly responsible for the collapse of the Republic. Yay! It´s a fun game.

18.00

You guys are obsessed with Trump, did you use to date him? Because you pretend like you hate him but I think you love him. I think what no one in this room wants to admit is that Trump has helped all of you. He couldn´t sell steaks or vodka or water or college or ties or Eric, but he has helped you. He´s helped you sell your papers and your books and your TV. You helped create this monster and now you´re profiting off of him. And if you´re gonna profit off of Trump, you should at least give him some money because he doesn´t have any. Trump is so broke (How broke is he?) he grabs pussies ´cause he thinks there might be loose change in them. Alright, like an immigrant who was brought here by his parents and didn´t do anything wrong, I´ve gotta get the fuck out of here. Good night! Flint still doesn´t have clean water!

 

Vocabulary:

Pleasantries: polite remarks usually made by people when they first meet to show they are friendly. Eg: The officials shook hands and exchanged pleasantries about the weather before getting down to business.


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